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Old

Here Come The Demons

Posted 12-26-2012 at 04:56 AM by caninemom3
Updated 12-26-2012 at 05:16 AM by caninemom3

Christmas is once again over. The build-up was as amazing as ever. On Thanksgiving I put up the tree and we had our traditional Thanksgiving feast, my husband and I and our furkids. On December 1, brimming with excitement as it was both my sister's birthday AND the day she and I put up her tree, I went to my sister's home for the coming celebrations of the day.

When my sister and I are together we are like little kids, both completely oblivious to what is going on around and just focused on each other and our own world. We "ooh and ah" at lights, decorations, carols, and everything at Christmastime. It was an amazing day. Later in the afternoon on December 1 my dear brother-in-law, who is really more of a brother than anything, took us to dinner, which is a custom when I go to their house to help decorate. Then back again to their house for more sister fun. When we were finished we stood back and looked very proudly at the beautiful tree we created and congratulated...
MMC Christmas Angel (1954 - 2013)
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Views 1070 Comments 3 caninemom3 is offline
Old

Exhaustion

Posted 03-26-2012 at 09:20 PM by caninemom3

It is a Monday evening and I am sitting by the fireplace with a fire nicely warming my corner of the living room. My canine kids are all asleep. My 5-1/2 year old, Clancy, is asleep beside me. My 4-month-old baby, Hermione is asleep on the other couch and my dear sweet old man of 15, Wishbone is asleep on the foot stool nuzzled up against my feet and here I sit completely and utterly exhausted yet wide awake.

There are so many reasons why I feel this way I think. One reason is my current job. I have been a transcriptionist for nearly 18 years and no job has ever made me so tired as the one I have now. I just can''t figure out why I am reacting this way. This is just doing the same thing I have done for nearly two decades but never have I ever been so out of it by the time I finish my shift. I just dont get it. I honestly feel this job is killing me, yet I cant give it up. The money is too good.

I have been thinking so much lately about things I have no control...
MMC Christmas Angel (1954 - 2013)
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Views 942 Comments 0 caninemom3 is offline
Old

19 Years And Counting........

Posted 10-31-2011 at 12:32 AM by caninemom3

I remember it as though it were yesterday. It was Fall, just after Halloween. The air had a kind of Autumn/burning leaf smell when you went outside. It had been raining that day. Early in the morning my husband, David, had called to say he would be late and just wanted to tell me he loved me as I was returning back to work at Rite Aid that day and we would miss each other in passing. He had worked nights and was really tired. More tired than normal, I thought. We had been married for 20 years. I met David when I was 16 and I married him when I was 17, almost 18. He was a mere 20 and turned 21 the year we got married.

We were exact soul mates for one another. We loved the same books, the same movies, and we could talk for hours on end which we did regularly. David always tried to tell me I was just as smart as he but I always knew better.

That Fall morning after I spoke to David I got up and got my shower and went on my way to Rite Aid. It was not going to...
MMC Christmas Angel (1954 - 2013)
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Views 5616 Comments 9 caninemom3 is offline
Old

"Of All The Charlie Browns In The World....."

Posted 09-17-2011 at 09:17 PM by caninemom3

The most wonderful time of the year is upon us again. Christmas time. The lights, the feeling, the magic in the air that you can actually breath in. Most everyone in my Christmas family are looking forward to the Season of Seasons. I love Christmas absolutlely and totally adore it yet this evening as much as I want to think about it and feel the excitement like everyone else, I cannot.

Frustration. Anger. Sadness. Hopelessnes. Uncertainty. Fear. Regret.

These feelings are not the feelings of someone who is looking forward to Christmas. Instead they are feelings which indicate and have indicated for many years the need for a drastic change in lifestyle. A change I am not brave enough in any way, shape or form to bring about.

I have spoken of this in the past and for those who have read my blog, you know what and who I am referring to.

The problem is I feel powerless to effect the changes that I know in the long run would be best...
MMC Christmas Angel (1954 - 2013)
Posted in Uncategorized
Views 1963 Comments 1 caninemom3 is offline



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