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Old 01-31-2014, 11:07 AM
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Opera's by Binger

August 10, 2007 -

Originally Posted by Binger
THE OPERA.. PART XXII

Act One:

Opening scne.. the Israel Lites Deli.... It is Hot, Hazy, Humid.... Binger and Scrooge are
sitting outside singing the Aria.. " Iced Coffee in the Morning.. Iced Coffee in the
Evening.. Iced Coffee in the early morning..."- The lovely Cedar is serving up malts in her
best Dusty Wig.. she too breaks into an aria entitled " The look of love.... is when temps
are below 103 degrees..." Jay and The Stars enter and dance a paus du lux entitled " Ode to
Ham on Rye.." It is obvious that the Israel Lites Deli is a happy place..... with much
partying late into the night

end act one ( and we all know what's coming..)

Act two:
Opens with radio jon dropping from the ceiling announcing the closing of the Israel Lites
Deli. He sings the aria " by order of the evil Crownster... The Deli is closed and using
their magical powers.. everyone is hereby sent to Aquafinaland.." ( where there is no
coffee)- Everyone is confused... but that is due to the lack of Coffee... Crown enters and
sings the aria " at last... now I may sleep and sleep without the Deli keeping me awake at
night.."- The Israel Lites is closed and shuttered and as the curtain closes, we see Crown
pulling up their mattress to the building and announcing that it is now a Mattress
Discounters store.. They then break into the aria " Sleep on it.. play on it.. have a good
night's sleep on us.. mattress discounters..."
(end act 2)

Act 3 ( finale)

Opens with Jeff Westover announcing via an aria that The Israel Lites is reopening and that
Crown's evil powers have been revoked and in order to create a new universe of happiness Jana
will be joining the staff of Israel Lites and serving a new dish called " the nugget" which
goes well with iced coffee, plus, left over nuggets will be used each night to build a wall
between Crown and the Deli, thus never disrupting their slumber again. Cedar joins Jay as the
curtian closes and in one of the most beautiful moments ever in Operatic history, we see them
sticking Crown's hand in a warm bucket of water as they sleep. The crowd at the Israel Lites
all break into the aria " Lean on me.." Sandy annpucnes that The Israel Lites is now Open for business....

end...

Special shout out to RadioJonD for this post back in 2011 with all of the links to all of the Opera's up until that point.

http://www.mymerrychristmas.com/foru...postcount=1730
__________________

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot
Don't forget to listen to the Greasy Skillet Saturday nights 8 to 10pm EST
Leader of the get Steven Colbert to keep Lovemas tradition movement!!!
Stay Safe and Hurry Back Dawg!!!!

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September 9, 2007 -

Originally Posted by Binger
THE OPERA.. PART XXVIII

Act One:

Opening scene.. a village- with a fountain- Carl the Camel walks in and sips long and hard
from the fountain.. he belts out the aria " It's not H20.. it is coffee.. glorious
coffee/java/ dark roast/light roast/ coffee in the daytime.. coffee in the nighttime.."-
coffeee.. who needs water or three coins in a fountain when there is COFFEE.."- Binger is
seen standing on top of the fountain looking down on their camel and lip synching between
sips... Cedar enters and is gaily dressed.. she belts out the aria " It's my Birthday and I'll sing
Dusty if I want to.."- so she then drops the prtenese at being Leslie Gore and goes right
into " Son of A Precaher Man.."- she then sits on the fountain as guests begin to arrive.. it
is her BIRTHDAY.... Renna arrives with a bouquet of flowers..... Jay enters and presents a
birthday gift along with the Stars of a Paus Du Lux entitled " Ode to Joy" and " then dances
a Paus Du Solo of " Ode to Cheer"- which befuddles everyone until Binger arrives and presents
a gift of a double stackable LG Stainless Steel Washer/Dryer.. There is great merriment and
then with dark lighting and with the orchestra playing a funeral dirge.... Crown enters...

end Act 1

Act 2...
Crown announces that the birthday party celebration is over.. and then using their magical
powers.. casts a spell on Cedar that makers her not want to wash any clothes.. Crown is angry
and afraid that the Stackable Washer and Dryer will cause a loud spinning sound and thus keep
them awake at night.. Crown belts out the aria " The Look of Love.... is wrinkled dirty
clothes.. splattered with Binger's Coffee and no one is able to wash them..."- Cedar is seen
attempting to wash Jay's tights using a rock- but they cause a hole in the seat and we see
Jayish dancing a Paus Du Lux with Auntie Mistletoe attemtping to sew up the seat.

end Act 2

Act 3 ( Finale)

Opens with Sandy announcing that there are only 364 days left until Cedar's next Birthday and
we can once again present Birthday gifts..and she sings an aria suggesting that we give a
MAPQUEST to the nearest laudramat.."- Clark Griswold enters and sings the aria that he too
has magical powers and can reverse the damage that Crown ahs caused.." We see Crown enter and
they have had a change of heart and can be seen pouring " BORAX" into the new stackable while
singing the Aria " Kansas City Blues... wash with likeable colors.."- Iron Eagle points out
that the lights on the Washer/Dryer are now visible as functioning... and, in one of the most
memorable moments ever in Operatic History.. we see Crown sitting on top of the Dryer during
the spin cycle- taking a nap of course..." The entire company comes together and sings "
Clean Underwear: mom was right.. one never knows when you might go to the hospital.."

end...
__________________

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot
Don't forget to listen to the Greasy Skillet Saturday nights 8 to 10pm EST
Leader of the get Steven Colbert to keep Lovemas tradition movement!!!
Stay Safe and Hurry Back Dawg!!!!

Last edited by made582; 02-02-2014 at 09:20 PM.
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November 18, 2007 -

Originally Posted by Binger
THE OPERA.. PART XXVI

Act One:
Opens with Carl the Camel walking out on stage... he sits and disperses his famous
" Bananna Mocha Java" to Binger who sits back in a state of happiness that hasn't been
observed since "The Ice Capades" 1984. They break into an aria that ends with " Ohh the
Pines.. Ohh The Pines.. The Shispering Pines.." which is a cue- the entire set opens up and
in walks Cedar- who sings an aria annoucning that the Shipseing Pines Community is going to
host the Annual " DINAH SHORE CLASSIC.." a huge cheer goes up and various performers enter
(all wearing an identical Dusty Springfield Wig)- Jayish enters and dances a paus du lux
entitled" Ode To a Tall Weed in a Gale force Wind"- Maureen enters ( with Viking Hat on top
of her Dusty Wig) and sings an aria entitled " Ode to Plaid.. It is the Scottish way.." Then,
as the partying comes to a frenzy... ( lights darken,,, flowers wilt... music (heavy) begins
playing- funeral dirge like... ) in walks Crown.... end act 1...

Act 2:
Opens with the same dark clouds overhead and Crown announcing via aria that the DINAH SHORE
CLASSIC will not be held.. in fact- the Shispering Pines will be shutting down since the
smell and "shispering" awakens them and they are unable to get their required 19 hour nap.
Renna and Auntie Mistletoe arrive and sing an aria offering to make blinds and ear plugs..
but Crown shuns them and announces that( via aria) that they hold the deeds to all land in
town. Sandy announces in aria that the Shispering Pines will shut down at noon.. 12 hours.. 6
minutes.. 33 seconds..All residents of the happy community are stunned, except for Jayish who
dances a paus du lux entitled" Ode to a Real Estate Mogul infomercial.." The curtian comes
down as the residents follow Jay's tutu to a small hut ( being decorated with lights by Iron
Eagle.. who sings the aria " Chicago: It's my kind of town..") end.. act 2:

Act 3 (finale)
Opens with Crown sitting behind their desk and singing an aria about foreclosing on land and
making plans to turn the Shispering Pines into a "retirement community" ( they like the sound
of that- "retire.. meaning to nap..") Then.. with a burst of lighnting.. Radio John announces
that the residents of shispering pines have all banned together and achieved "REAL ESATTE
SUCCESS" through a late night infomerical and they in fact now own Crown's home,,, which is
being abolished to make way for a sushi-bar/lanudromat ( complete with Cedar sitting on top
of the douible "LF Stainless steel stackables singing an aria entitled" "Fired Twinkie's...
good with Java..) and that the rest of the land is going to be used for the "DINAH SHORE
CLASSIC.."- the entire company comes together to banish Crown into the light ( not the
darkness. since it is too easy to sleep there) where they must watch "Dancing with Stars" as
punishment for trying to destroy the Shispering Pines. As the curtain closes.. we see Jayish
and Auntie dancing a paus du lux entitled: " Century 21... why hasn't it advanced to 22 after
all these years?"

end
__________________

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot
Don't forget to listen to the Greasy Skillet Saturday nights 8 to 10pm EST
Leader of the get Steven Colbert to keep Lovemas tradition movement!!!
Stay Safe and Hurry Back Dawg!!!!

Last edited by made582; 02-02-2014 at 09:21 PM.
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Old 01-31-2014, 11:08 AM
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January 6, 2008 -

Originally Posted by Binger
Ok here goes... THE OPERA PART XXVIII "The Snow Queen"

Part One:
Scene- winter wonderland... ice, snow, Dairy Queen in background..... Blue and Silver Blizzards
Cedar enters and begins taking pictures all around.. She is wearing her Dusty Springfield Wig
and sings the beautiful aria " I am not a drfit.." others enter including Maureen who
immediately asks via an aria to "Take a picture of the background since the icicles appear to
weave an intersting plaid pattern.." Cedar does and the two begin plotting to open a chain of
Holly Lobby Stores which feature the new " CEDMO" photographs which feature plaid
backgrounds. Holiday enters and via an aria announces that she too wants a piece of the
retail picture. As Act One comes to a close, we see a Holly Lobby Store being erected next to
the Dairy Queen. There is much rejoicing at the possibility of new retail store and an
abundance of minimum wage jobs. Cedar continues taking pictures and sings the aria " The Look
of Love is a Eckhardt 1000 Multi Disc Chromatic Camera..."

end Act 1

Act two..
Crown enters (lights dim, flowers wilt, cars stall, children scream...) and announces in an
aria that there will be no store as they will use their powers to stop the picture taking. In
an aria, they announce that "The flash from the picture taking is keeping me awake.."
Radiojon appears and in a booming aria announced "The Holly Lobby is closed and will be
turned into a mattress factory. Crown uses their powers to imprison Cedar in the Dairy Queen,
where she is forced to work with blizzards. Binger appears and sings the aria "Even a mocha
java jolt does not bring me happiness.. I miss the CEDMO pictures" Jayish enters and dances a
paus du lux entitled "Urgent: It's not a song from 1980 by Foreigner.. It is a song about
middle aged men..." ( pause here to allow audience to recover from laughter)... despite the
lightness of the moment.. there is great saddness. We see Cedar in the background sitting at
the dairy queen and molding her blizzard into a sculpture of a tractor while bluegrass star
Mac Wiseman sings in the background..." Ain't no sunshine in my life.."

end Act 2

Act Three: (Finale)
Binger enters the Dairy Queen and orders a coffee flavored blizzard. Cedar makes a huge
blizzard and then uses it to climb out of the Dairy Queen. She stands on top of the building
and is granted powers from Auntie Mistletoe who enters from the sky singing the aria
"Ohhhh Canada: Land of Ice, Snow, and William Shatner.. three elements which bring about
shivering" Cedar then uses her picture taking skills and makes Crown admit that no one needs
19 hours of sleep per day and that the Holly Lobby Store can open, and will even inlcude a
minature section devoted to "napping." Then, in one of the most moving moments ever, Crown
and Binger team up and announce they will form a rock band entitled " Monarch Mystery.."
which will inlcude backdrops of CEDMO" pictures while they perform the hit single
"Coffee and Sleep: Not necessarily a contradiction." Maureen announces that the first exhibit
at Holly Lobby will be entitled "Jayish: Thy tights are too tight.." Curtain closes with sila
announcing in the world's shortest aria "Good evening."

end..
__________________

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot
Don't forget to listen to the Greasy Skillet Saturday nights 8 to 10pm EST
Leader of the get Steven Colbert to keep Lovemas tradition movement!!!
Stay Safe and Hurry Back Dawg!!!!

Last edited by made582; 02-02-2014 at 09:22 PM.
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March 23, 2008 -

Originally Posted by Binger
THE OPERA ( Part XXVIII) ( cause I love you guys..)

Act One: Setting The Shispering Pines Motel/ Coffee Shop/Banjo Repair Shop
Curtains open to reveal the Shispeing Pines Coffee Shop. Binger enters and is giddy beyond
belief and sings a beautiful aria entitled.." Ode to the Blend of The Day.." Cedar enters and
pours them a cup of coffee while adjusting her Dusty Wig/ She then stands on top of the
counter and sings the aria " Ohhh what a beautiful morning.. ohh what a look of love....is
the Shispering Pines Coffee Shop..."- Sila sings the world shortest opera with two words..
" Merry Christmas.." Maureen is seen in the background huddled over a sewing machine singing
an aria " ode to the plaid tablecloth.." Jay enters and dances a paus du lux entitled
" Fix my banjo please.." There is obviously great joy and happiness, especially when Auntie
enters from the back room and announces in aria that as chef she is placing Fired Twinkies as
the special of the day.." The house lights go up and every one breaks into a paus du lux
entitled " Sugar: Body's natural substitute for diabetes.." ( end Act One).

Act Two: Opens again with the Shispering Pines Coffee shop. Binger is seen still sitting at
the bar with 100's of coffee cups around them. The beautiful singer Cedar is seen making
shakes as she fixes her Dusty Wig and singing the aria " Ode to Aqua Net.." Annette enters
and asks via aria if her banjo can be fixed in order to wear it as an Easter Bonnet. Just as
Jay prepares to dance a paus du lux with new partner dom.. Crown enters ( lights dim,
children scream, women get up and run out of audience.. fog rolls in, rain begins pelting the
audience... Dusty wig goes limp... coffee goes cold.. paus du lux stops dead.. funeral dirge
begins palying) and announces in broken aria that they have used their life savings that once
padded their mattress to buy the Shispering Pines complex and thus, they are closing the
Coffee Shop/Banjo Repair Shop inorder to expand.. what else, the bedrooms in order that they
might sleep in a different room each morning/noon/night. Lights dim as Binger is seen
screaming in pain as a "closed sign" is placed on the coffee urn. ( end Act Two).

Act Three:
Opens with the former patrons of the Shispering Pines complex sitting on the curb outside
playing the "Look for a License Plate from Idaho.." game ( except for Binger who is curled in
a ball going into withdrawl). Cedar's wig is limp from lack of Aqua net. Auntie tries to
cheer everyone up with a batch of Fired Twinkies but no one is interested. Crown enters and
sings an aria entitled " Ode to a Bulldozer who is going to expand my bedroom capacities.."
The crowd all boo and begin throwing fired twinkies at them. Everyone simultaneously gets up
and dance a paus du lux entitled "Ode to a collapsing real estate market.." However, the
fired twinkies begin falling into a special pattern and everyone realizes the opportunity at
hand. A giant " we can do it poster" falls from the sky as a backdrop.. ( end Act Three)

Act Four: ( finale)

Opens with a NEW Shispering Pines Coffee Shop/ Banjo Repair/ Paus Du Lux teaching studio,
built entirely out of Fired Twinkies. Binger is seen singing the aria " Who needs a Motel..
or sleep.. or food for that matter... JAVA is the nectar of life..." Cedar is seen spraying
Aqua Net and reviving the Dusty Wig while singing " Ode to Billy Joe..." The patrons all
gather around her and sing along even Maureen who is seen huddled over a world map while
humming the aria "Tomorrow: I'll slip cover Canada in plaid and continue my world
domination.." Jay is seen teaching a paus du lux with students slg/rena/iron eagle/
gracie/momaduke/holiday entitled " New York Politics: Dysfunction or just Plain Nuts.." the
curtain closes as the crowd all take turns prank calling Crown's room and singing an aria
entitled" Your mattress has ben recalleed due to entyozymenes.."
as the curtain closes... everyone breaks into the Monty Python Dead parrot sketch...

end..
March 24, 2008 -
Originally Posted by Binger
Addendum: Opera.. part Twenty Eight ( act 4 addendum)

Radio jond rops from the ceiling and announces that they have found an old radio program full
of great Artie Shaw music. They begin playing it and Jayish breaks into a paus du lux that
makes everyone cry when in one of the most moving moments ever in Operatic History, Crown
realizes that the Shispering Pines is full of great art. They halt the destruction and join
in the building of the Shispering Pines Coffee Shop, Dance Studio, and Sushi bar.

end....
__________________

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot
Don't forget to listen to the Greasy Skillet Saturday nights 8 to 10pm EST
Leader of the get Steven Colbert to keep Lovemas tradition movement!!!
Stay Safe and Hurry Back Dawg!!!!

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December 21, 2008 -

Originally Posted by Binger
THE OPERA>>> PART XXVIII

ACT ONE: SCENE ONE...

Opens with snow falling on the shispering pines combination sushi bar/coffee house. Carl the
Camel enters and begins to dispense his favorite blend of eggnog/vanilla spice/blueberry java
blend. Binger immediately enters and sings the aria: Coffee; WO/MANS Best friend and I Love
Mrs. Folgers... The Camel and Binger exit stage right just as sparklenana enters and looks at
the jukebox... instead of happy christmas songs, she sings the aria "Why is the only song
here " Ode to Billy Joe" ( DustySpringfield hit circa 1970...)..... she then shakes her head and
exists stage left- almost bumping into jayish who dances a paus du lux entitled.." Tonight.. The
Winter Solsitce.. from the dark into the light.." which culminates with his glow in the dark tights
illuminating the backstage.." end Act One.

Act two: Enters with Holiday entering the shispering pines singing the aria.. "Ode to Joy
There is today December 22nd thirty seconds more light than yesterday.. the days will get
longer and there will be joy here at the shispering pines.." She thenl eaves and Jayish
enters to dance a second paus du lux entitled.." ohhh Canada: look at my Mapleleaf" This
brings out Auntie Mistletoe who dances a joint paus du lux with Jayish which culmiantes with
both wearing glow in the dark tights which illumiante the emtire audience and half of the
block..
end act two...

Act Three Opens with Crown ( lights darken in auditorium)..... entering and announcing to the
audience via an aria that sounds like a funeral dirge, that using their new found powers (
besrowed in OPERA PART XVII by Jeff Westover..) That the Shispering Pines is being shut down
and Christmas is cancelled.. They announce they are depressed and saddened over the increased
sunlight that will cause them to get less than 15 hours of sleep per day. All previous
backlighted areas courtesy of Jayish' tights are darkeend and we see Crown trying to dance a
Paus Du Lux to "Ode to Billy Joe.." end act Three:

Act Four ( finale):

Opens with Maureen entering and using a special woven plaid, she sings an aria that the
tartan Gods have shined a new light upon Crown and they are going to get their required 15
hours sleep per day and the Shispeing Pines will reopen with new plaid tablecloths on each
table and new curtains which will allow Crown to pull shut and take a three hour quick nap
after the afternoon sushi crowd leaves. In one of the most moving momenste ever in Operatic
History, Jayish enters and dances a paus du lux entitled: "Scotch" It isn't just a
transparent tape for Christmas.. " The paus du lux ends with Jayish's tights illuminating the
EXIT sings for the audience patrons....

End....
__________________

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot
Don't forget to listen to the Greasy Skillet Saturday nights 8 to 10pm EST
Leader of the get Steven Colbert to keep Lovemas tradition movement!!!
Stay Safe and Hurry Back Dawg!!!!

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March 15, 2009 -

Originally Posted by Binger
THE OPERA.. PART XXX

Act One:

Opens with a scene of a village- the villagers all gather in the Town Sqaure- enter Jayish
who dances a paus du lux while mayor Maureen sings the aria" Plaid: It's not just a hobby but
a way of life..." The villagers all get excited at Jay's dancing and begin throwing noodles
at him. Auntie enters and sings the aria" ahhhh. Pasta..."- and picks up each noodle- and
begins cooking them in a vat annoucing that later, the village will be fed using Jay's tossed
leiderhosen as a strainer. Christmas Granny as mayor enters and announces ( via aria) that at
dinner, Jayish will debut a new dance which is entitled the official slogan of the New Jersey
Tourist Industry: Come Back to New Jersey: We Weren't Shooting at You.." the curtain closes
as the villagers all rejoice and head for the pasta line: end.. act one:

Act Two
Curtain opens to see Track Rebel attemtping to post bulletins all over town in a desire to
break a world record.. he sings the aria:" 4,000 is possible and then.. double digits.." he
then stumbles upon a set of furniture (placed near Crown's home.. we see in the background
with NEON flashing..- inlcuding a shape which is apparently a CAMEL seen dancing to " I will
survive" the golden disco classic) Santa's helper enters and sings the aria" Oh what a
beautifukl morning.. oh what a beautiful IKEA semi-hard veneer wood wardrobe...with matching
smei-pegged plaster of paris mathcing bedroom suite... and at that precise moment, we see
Jayish enter and attempt to dance a paus du lux around the furniture... he then stumbles and
is in great agony. Binger enters and offers to pour warm coffee on his back ( via aria they
sing this and it is apparent that it is a GREAT sacrifice.. though they are willing to do
it..)- Crown enters and through an aria we see that it is THEIR EVIL motive to hurt Jayish..
and via an aria announces the pasta paus du lux/New jersey perforamce is over and instead,
there will be a sub performance of IKEA: THE MUSICAL.. as performed by Holiday Honey and the
All Kroger Supermarket Choir. the villagers are depressed and we see them throwing
basketballs at Crown as the curtain closes. End act two...

ACT Three Finale;

Opens with Christmas Star and Santa's Helper both sobbing and collapsing into a heap as they
have just wintessed IKEA: The Musical..and without jayish's Paus Du Lux.. the show brings
tears to their eyes.. not in emotion but in boredom... we see in the background Crown
grinning wildly as they sleep against CARL THE CAMEL and eyeballing the horrific IKEA
furniture. Jayish limps in and attempts a paus du lux, only it is obvious his heart and
backbone just isn't into it. Then, in one of the most moving moment's EVER in opera history,
we see Maureen using her magical powers to weave a combined plaid leiderhosen slingshot,
wherein hundreds of pieces of crappy funiture are hurled at Crown, one of which hits them on
their head - awakening them..wherein they have a change of heart and announce via aria that
they are going to drain Carl's third hump of the magical coffee ( we see Binger standing
nearby sobbing..) to be used as a magical potion to cure Jayish's bad back and the
performance of New Jersey will proceed as planned. The villagers all rejoice and are seen
amassing on the New Jersey Turnpike cheering and shooting their guns wildly into the air.. as
the curtian closes.

end>
__________________

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot
Don't forget to listen to the Greasy Skillet Saturday nights 8 to 10pm EST
Leader of the get Steven Colbert to keep Lovemas tradition movement!!!
Stay Safe and Hurry Back Dawg!!!!

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Old 01-31-2014, 11:10 AM
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October 25, 2009 -

Originally Posted by Binger
THE OPERA.. PART XXXIII

ACT ONE..
Enters with Jayish who dances a Paus Du Lux entitled.." A new Show on MMC Radio..' His
dancing entices the entire village to come out and sing the back up aria.." Hey.. your tights
are on backwards.." Jayish then dances a second paus du lux which ends with his sweating
profusely and all western state members of the forum singing the beautiful aria.." There's
enough water pouring off him to end the drought in New Mexico.." The act ends with Ballcoach
singing the aria.." Why am I watching this when the race is on...?" Just as ballcoach exits,
a dark shadowy figure emerges.. ( stage goes dark... loud snoring is heard in background as
the curtain drops..)

Act 2 Opens with the entire company lead by Maureen singing the beauiful aria.." Plaid: It
isn't just stripes.. but a pattern for the world.."- The shadow figure reemerges and the
audience sees that it is Crown.. angry that all the dancing and singing has awkaened them
from their 6th nap of the day... They then use their wizardly powers to enslave Jayish to a
sign post at SONIC which reads.." I can hear your arteries clogging special burger.. 1.99
combo.." Brad attempts to free Jayish by singing the aria.." The Ozarks: mountains or bad 70s
singing band?" but to no avail.. Binger and Carl the Camel enter and attempt to free Jayish
by pouring a strong blueberry mocha blend on his chains.. but then stop and the two are seen
licking Jayish's chains ...the act closes as we see Radio Jon annoucning SONIC as closing due
to the un appetizing sight of a man in tights chained to a drive in... end act two...

Act Three: Opens with Crown seen sleeping in a hammck.. they are obviously dreaming of time
off at the holidays and the ability to sleep some more... plus the thought of a double fired
twinkie from the state fair.... Christmasstar enters and sings the Opera..
" here is a cake.. with a file in it.." Minta enters and sings the Opera.." Is it a file with
a virus? If so.. give it to CROWN.. who started this mess.." Santa's Helper enters and is
seen feeding the cake to Jayish who is also eating a SONIC Bacon Double cheeseburger combo
delux with fries and shake... they then suffer profuse sweating and are able to slip out of
the chains.. the entire company rejoices and sings the aria.." Who needs WD 40 when you have
greaseburgers?" the act ends with Johnor and Hooiser Christmas attemtping to dance a paus du
lux with Jayish.. but their tights are also on backwards and the entire company is seen
holding their sides in laughter...

ACt 4..( finale)
The entire company surrounds Crown.. who naturally is asleep and decide that they must be
punished for enslaving Jayish at SONIC.. the company then take Crown and enslave them at a
computer and make them reference WIKIPEDIA submissions on "The War of 1812.." the lovely
overture is heard in the backgorund.. wherein the boom continuosuly awakens Crown and they
are not able to sleep for a straight 4 hours...
then in one of the most beautiful moments ever in Opera History.. we see Crown attenpt a paus
du lux and sings the Opera.." I am reformed and will never ever ensalve another person for
keeping me awake longer than 19 minutes.." and in a true test of faith.. we see Crown go
through the trials of eating at SONIC and as the curtain falls, we see them getting their
cholesterol checked at a drive in pharmacy...

end....
__________________

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot
Don't forget to listen to the Greasy Skillet Saturday nights 8 to 10pm EST
Leader of the get Steven Colbert to keep Lovemas tradition movement!!!
Stay Safe and Hurry Back Dawg!!!!

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  #9  
Old 01-31-2014, 11:10 AM
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January 24, 2010 -

Originally Posted by Binger
THE OPERA>>> PART XXXVIII

"The Dead Battery.."
ACT 1

Curtain arises and we see Brad approach his truck.. he sings the beautiful aria " Ohhh
truck.. take me to the festival.." (lyrics indicate the fabulous Festival celebrating the
talents of the Ozark Mountain Daredevils when tens of people ascend on the town to celebrate
their recording career.." However, as the aria finishes.. we see Brad in despair since the
truck will not start...
Jayish enters and dances a Paus Du Lux entitled.." Chevy/Ford.. it don 't matter anymore..
battery is done.." (this leaves the crowd gasping over the beauty of the tights which have a
screenprint of Lee Iacocca on the front..)
Binger enters and sings the aria.." What that truck needs is coffee." THEY summon Carl the
Camel in and they fill the radiator with coffee from Carl's third hump.. Carl attempts to
dance a paus du lux with Jayish entitled.." Stereotypes... I hate them.. and if you disagree
my boys and me will breaka your face.." The truck however refuses to start..
Coach enters and sings the aria.." Balls... makes the world go round.." and we see him place
baseballs under each wheel.. however, the truck still will not move... and there is great
despair.. even though all three are seen under the truck siphoning the coffee from the
radiator.... Act 1 ends with the flashing sign at the shispering pines announcing the
cancellation of the Ozark Mountain Daredevils Festival and thus, all six rooms booked for the
festival are now available...new Shispering Pines resident Pup is seen looking at the
combined sushi bar/coffeeshop and humming the aria.." Is there something here I'm just not
getting?" end ACT 1.

Act 2 Opens with the evil Crown.. they enter and sing the aria.." It is I who disabled the
truck.. which backfires and awakend me from my 9AM nap.. right after I took my 8AM nap... and
after I awakened from my 14 hour nap.." We see Crown then enter their hammock... Auntie
enters and sings the aria.." Maple leafs.. that is what is needed here.." and we see her mix
them into the radiator of the truck.. which still refuses to move.. ( lighting fades to
black..) Sugarplum Fairy and Annette enter and sing the aria.." YOO YOO Jackie Blue.." though
the towns people are too in despair to respond, and as the curtain closes.. we see the
Shispering Pines via Radio Jon announce that it is closing due to low volume....end ACT 2..

ACT 3 finale:
Opens with the town in deep despair.. Brent is seen singing the aria.."Aint no sunshine in my
life..." Crown sings the aria.." Good..less sunshine means more darkness and more sleep."
Christmasstar sings the aria.." Cake: it isn't just for desert.." and she entices Crown to
awaken long enough to eat some cake shaped in the form of a mattress which causes them to
fall asleep ( AGAIN..) and in one of the most moving moments ever in Opera.. we see Made and
Maureen enter.. Made slips a fried pickle/fired twinkie into the truck radiator and it
magically starts.. we see Brad rush to the truck and announce that the Festival is on..
Maureen is seen slipcovering the truck in a brillant green plaid and disguise it as a sofa..
which will convince Crown that the truck is still inoperable... and thus, they cannot ever
again cancel the festival. the entire company comes together and sings the 1970s DISCO hit.."
I will survive.." with Jayish dancing a paus du lux in the background entitled.." New
Jersey.. A Chemical State of Mind.." as the curtain closes...

end...
__________________

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot
Don't forget to listen to the Greasy Skillet Saturday nights 8 to 10pm EST
Leader of the get Steven Colbert to keep Lovemas tradition movement!!!
Stay Safe and Hurry Back Dawg!!!!

Last edited by made582; 02-02-2014 at 09:55 PM.
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  #10  
Old 01-31-2014, 11:10 AM
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March 21, 2010 -

Originally Posted by Binger
Here ya go: Variation on a Theme: THE OPERA PART XXXIX " The Evil Butterfly"

Act 1- Opens to the usual blank stage. The curtian stays open 27 minutes and closes,

Act 2- Opens with Coach coming in- dressed as a beautiful butterfly- his wings made of old
baseballs.. Made enters with wings made of Indianapolis Colt paraphanelia.... they sing the
beautiful aria.." Nascar.. it is all about speed and drinking at 6AM.." Jayish enters with
wings made from various parts of New Jersey ( car parts, factories, and Jimmy Hoffa) he
dances the paus du lux entitled.." Ikea: The future of non functional furniture.." Binger and
Carl the Camel enter, Binger's wings are made from Coffee filters and they sing the aria.."
Coffee: It isn't just for breakfst any longer... or lunch.. oir dinner.. or a midnight
snack.. or 5 Am..." Bradmarc enters ( Brad's wings are made from tape from his Ozark Mountain
Daredevil 8-track Collection) and they sing the aria entitled.." Bass fishing: Big Mouths
deserve hooks in them.." Autie Misteltoe and Christmas Star enter ( wings made from maple
leafs) and announce via aria with great excitement that a new butterfly will be joining the
community, namely Christmas- a holic" whose wings will be made from speeches made by Geroge
W. Bush, former Governor of Texas. This causes great excitment and as the curtian closes, we
see all butterflies crowding Carl and siphoning his latest blend.." Mocha Elivs Memphis Blend
which is a combination of ribs and krispy kreme donuts.. curtain closes to the company
singing.."Viva Las Jayish" as he dances the paus du lux... end act 2

Act 3.. opens with Crown enterring ( wings made from old bed and mattress parts) they sing
the aria " I am tired of all the butterfly noise..which keeps me awake and away from my 1, 2,
and 3 pm nap" and they use their special wizardly powers to summon all the butterflies
there.. who all arrive except for Coach.. who was diagnosed with ADD after spending 17 hours
watching a replay of the 1980-1983 world series on cable tv/.... Crown then whips out a giant
bottle of RAID and attempts to spritz the other butterflies... they all scatter and scream as
Crown chases them singing the (aria) theme song from the 1970s hit " Mod Squad.." end act
3...

Act 4 ( Finale)- enters with Coach surveying the damage,,, the butterflies are
listless,except for Binger who never tires and is hyper for some strange reason... Coach then
summons Crown to the scene and proceeds to plead with them via aria to stop sprtizing the
beautiful butterflies, or face the wrath of having a catcher's mask thrown on top of their
mattress.... Crown, horrififed announces via aria that their depression is over their never
having met 1970s tv star " Florence Henderson" and thus, they hate all butterflies...Coach
then annonces via an aria that the other butterflies have pooled their money for a Christmas
present and will send Crown to a " Nick at Night" marathon wherein old tv stars show up and
sign autographs. Crown then announces via aria that they are surrendering their giant can of
RAID ( we see Brad laso it with a reel and rod) and in a giant symbolic gesture, the can is
destroyed while Made recites the horrific
1970s poem.." Butterflies are free.." The entire company comes together to oggle and awe over
Jayish's latest paus du lux, entitled.." New Jersey: swim in our water and watch your glow.."
as the curtain closes....

end...
__________________

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. ~George Eliot
Don't forget to listen to the Greasy Skillet Saturday nights 8 to 10pm EST
Leader of the get Steven Colbert to keep Lovemas tradition movement!!!
Stay Safe and Hurry Back Dawg!!!!

Last edited by made582; 02-02-2014 at 09:57 PM.
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